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Posted by on May 29, 2018 in Boys at School, Parenting Tips, Saving Our Sons, The Quest Project, Tips for Moms | 0 comments

Parenting Tips: Schools Out!

Spring and summer are my favorite seasons; the days are longer, and the sun shines brighter!  However, I know for many parents this time of year can be chaotic because SCHOOLS OUT!  Where’s my son, and what’s he doing! 

School’s Out for Summer

So here it is barely Spring time and the kids are getting out of school.  What have you planned with your son?  Are you going to take a vacation, maybe you planted a garden or have a spring/summer project to do together?  

I can already hear many of you saying, “Oh sure, I can’t get the kids to help me with anything!” 

Have you tried approaching it as a fun time together; make it special by thinking back and remembering some of the fun times you had as a kid.  Or better yet how you “wish” your parents had done things with you. 

Some of my best memories are when my parents just relaxed and were present with me and my siblings.  I didn’t grow up in a home where that was the norm so I appreciated it on the rare occasion it happened.  Once when I was 4 years old my mom just turned up the record player (yes, remember record players!) and we did the Hokey Pokey, it was a blast!  It was spontaneous and unexpected, yet it’s a memory all these years later that I still treasure.

A Good Example

Have you seen the movie “The Confirmation” starring Clive Owen?  He is a less than perfect dad, but throughout the movie he makes the effort to do better.  It’s a “feel good” movie about the relationship between father and son; and what happens when dad realizes how important he is to his son.  If you pay close attention to the non-verbal cues and body language you see just exactly how innately a young boy looks to his father for guidance.  I covered some of this in  Modern Day Rite Of Passage.

Dad being a healthy role model, mentoring his son.  Mom supporting the process, while the son innately turns to father”

The mom was great in the movie.  She recognized how important it was for her son to be with his dad and gave them the space to just be.  This movie won’t win any awards, but it drives home what I teach parents on a regular basis in my program The Quest Project®. 

Do Something Different

So my message to you this Spring/Summer season is to stop and think about your relationship with your son(s).  Consider how you might have your own renewed relationship and incorporate more fun and more time together.  It’s okay to be spontaneous, what kid doesn’t love a surprise?  Enjoy this time, what you do now will stay with your child forever.

Share your story of a fun, spontaneous time with your son, I’d like to hear about it.

Clayton Lessor
Clayton Lessor, PhD in education and counseling, is a Licensed Professional Counselor in private practice. He is author of "Generation of Men: How to raise your son to be a healthy man among men" and “Saving Our Sons: A Parent's Guide to Preparing Boys for Success." Dr. Clay has seen over 2000 boys since 2000 and facilitated over 300 The Quest Project groups. Boys attend a 10-week "boys to men program" where they and their parents will learn the tools needed to get through these turbulent teen years. Dr. Clay is a member of the Steering Committee for The Coalition to Create a White House Council for Boys and Men.
Clayton Lessor
Clayton Lessor

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